Guest lists and nightmares

Coming up with a guest list is hard! Our budget was modest so we couldn't invite everyone we had ever met in our lives. That was a little difficult for me, because that is exactly what I wanted to do. I had been to and around enough weddings and seen enough hurt feelings and bruised egos that I was scared to start finalizing who was important to share our special day with us.
I wanted to include so many people while excluding several who had been less than nice to me in the last few years. Yea...call me childish I know.
We started with 100 on our guest list. We were keeping it fairly low because we wanted to have it catered. The last thing I wanted was any family or friends cooking the food for my wedding. Not because I didn't trust them but because I wanted everyone to thoroughly enjoy themselves and have a good time!
Long story short (which I will go into another time) we decided to expand our guest list and ended up inviting almost 150 people.
Starting of course with the standard family and longtime friends, and slowly expanding into categories such as: "how long have we known them" to "will they dance" to "have they been nice to me and my family in the past." I mean we couldn't have people there who were going to be rude right? Or people who were going to be offended at songs or not shake their bon bons.
I must have gone through the guest list a good 100 times. I counted and counted and recounted every week it seemed. Since we were having wine and champagne I had to make sure there would be enough which was a major stress in inviting more than 100 people. That stuff is expensive! I had a total guest list as well as a  total drinkers list. I planned for a lot but I guess not everyone can down it like me because there were several cases left over afterward, which of course we didn't mind (although I am actually, gasp, a little sick of wine at this point.)
After we started getting RSVP's back I was able to go through the list more and invite more people. And the closer the wedding got the more I realized I wanted some others there even though they had remained on the B list throughout the entire process.
If you find yourself in that situation and maybe you are like me and don't have anymore invitations to send out or enough time, just own up to it. I told a few different couples that I was sorry this was coming late and especially sorry I didn't have anymore invitations, but weddings are hard and as much as I wanted to include everyone I wasn't sure how many more I could have but that it would mean a great deal to Braley and I if they could come.
And every single one of them came, happy to have been thought of. It helps that they were all married and understood the stress that comes with a limited budget and guest list.
Then there were the people that were upsetting to me. Upsetting and confusing. A few I sent out of obligation, we had know for far too many years to not invite them. And a couple I sent because I truly felt close and wanted them there. After not hearing from them and getting closer to the wedding I did what I had to do and asked if they were going to be able to make it. "Oh, we might be out of town that weekend, we aren't sure." "Oh, we can't make it, I didn't know if I should send the RSVP back."
You think you know people. After hearing their reply's, and getting over my annoyance that a road trip that wasn't even scheduled was somehow more important than a friend's wedding, I adjusted my list and invited those mentioned earlier, then ones that appreciated their invite so much, even though they never actually got one. Weddings will bring out the people who really care about you and are really happy for you and the others? The ones you think you know? Don't waste your postage.